I’m designating this day as Pity Party Tuesday. This morning, I thought about how the holidays are rolling along, and at this point it’s nearly certain that I will not find a job until 2017. I’ve been applying for jobs since August and networking and trying to stay busy. I don’t know how much longer I can maintain optimism, y’all. Unemployment in Austin is low, and I have watched a long line of friends land great new jobs.
Last fall was nearly identical to this one, months of applying for jobs, to the point that I feel as though I am stuck on a merry-go-round. Greg and I are even open to moving for my job, but that comes with the ridiculous implication that I can somehow land a job in a different place.
I should blog more, at least, but I feel like I can’t write honestly. All I want to write is: Will I ever be hired? Ever?! Instead, I write about books and movies and anything that could be more interesting than a bored, lonely unemployed lady. I worry that if I write honestly, I will be forced to answer for it at a future job interview. Because I do get asked about this blog in interviews and find myself stumbling to explain some post from three years ago in which I said I was bad with technology. If I can’t write honestly, then what is the point of this space?
The staying busy mainly involves doing every type of charitable work imaginable. I’m a mentor with an organization that provides support to women who have lost pregnancies or babies, and I was just matched with a new mom today. This morning, I bought groceries for the food bank. And this evening, I head to the hospital for my volunteer shift there.
This charitable work is done partly (selfishly) with the hope that putting good into the world will mean that good things come back to me. Mostly, I want to be of use.